Storm P Gallery

Till Galleri Storm P Svenska

Storm P Petersen © 2012, Anders S Svensson 

– You should get a job, my good man, work doesn´t hurt anybody!
– No, sir, but it takes so much time....

– These atoms are supposed to make everything superfluous...
– Sure enough, but give me a glass of beer anyhow!

– You think people can hear us?
– Oh yes, already many have closed their windows.

– Waiter, tell me, are you absolutely sure this is a really, really fresh egg?
– Definitely, sir, it actually shouldn´t had been laid until tomorrow!

– That soup can´t be particularly hot, since you can put your thumb in it!
– Oh, yes, it´s burning hot. But you get used to it...

– They say that time is money...
– Then we must be bloody well off, because we´ve got all the time in the world!

The man is unmusical – Soup is to be enjoyed pianissimo, never forte!

– Unbelievable, you look just like your brother!
– Yes, it´s incredible isn´t. I am my brother, actually.

Flies can live a fortnight without food – but they don´t want to!

– What kind of breed is it?
– I don´t know, I bought it as a rabbit!

– When does the train depart?
– Well, the train that earlier used to depart now now departs earlier.

– Now, how are you going to spend that coin?
– Well... it´s not enough for a motor cycle, so, maybe I´ll put it in the bank.

Fantastic watch. It makes an hour in 55 minutes.

– I hear you play the violin
– Impossible, it´s at home!

– Haven´t we met before?
– No but we can go out and come in again – then we have.

– Imagine if one had all the money one spent on beers!
– Yes, imagine how much beers one could buy!

– A Fiver! Great, soon I need an accountant!

– It´s an old Dutch painter!
– Amazing, he looks just like a young girl!

– You´re not as stupid as you look
– No, that´s the difference between the two of us.

– I´m having my wife painted.
– Well, I´m having my entrance painted.

– Do you collect stamps?
– No, we have a vacuum cleaner.

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– What are you doing loitering in middle of the night?
– Quiet, officer, please, don´t wake us, we´re sleepwalking.

– You seem to be afraid of soap and water.
– Well, I can´t put up with soap but now and then I take a sip of water.

– I´ve got it all up here, you know.
– Ah, yes, I see, all in a nutshell...

– You´re not as stupid as you look
– No, that´s the difference between the two of us.

Life is a like a desert - and we are the camels.

– What kind of human is he?
– I don´t know, I´ve never met him like that.

– What now, a minute ago you where on the other side of the street!
– Yes, sir, but this is my subsidiary...

– Now it´s like this, smoking contracts your blood vessels, but a couple of beers decontract them again.

– Cheer up, old boy!
– Impossible, the elevator is out of order!

Sunday used to be a nice, peaceful day until they invented the lawn-mover.

– I don´t care, you can do as like!
– Certainly not!

A synomymus is a word you can use if you don´t know how to spell the first one!

– Oh, yes, those were the days, it was a good knife!

– Listen, Euripides, fortunes up to 200 000 crowns are to be tax exempted!
– Hooray, then we´ll just make it...

– What if one had all the money one spends, then one would be well off!

– Well, what did the doctor said?
– He said I needed peace and quiet and shouldn't worry so much, and that worries me!

– I´m out walking to get an appetite for dinner.
– And I´m out walking to get a dinner for my appetite.

– Are you going to the country this summer?
– Yes, I´m going to the west coast, as usual!
– Is it a good place for rheumatism?
– Oh, yes, that´s where I got mine...

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– Am I to understand that it´s right not to tip here?
– No, I think it´s completely wrong!

– Are you happy, Herodotos?
– No, I´m one crown short!

– You´re always hanging around here. Don´t you ever do anything?
– Oh, yes, occasionally I sit down....

– My dear friend, I haven´t seen you for such a long time!
– Thanks, that´s nice of you.

– Do you like Kipling?
– I don´t know, I´ve never kippled before.

– I would like half a pound of butter, please.
– It´s kilo, nowadays, sir.
– Well, then give me half a pound of Kilo, please..

– Now we´re heading towards winter again!
– Yes, shall we walk the other way?

– Waiter! Give me some Swiss cheese, please. But only the holes, I´m on a strict diet...

– This is a torso.
– But, it hasn´t got any arms or legs!

– A camel can work for a fortnight without drinking!
– And my father can drink for a fortnight without working.

I´ve often thought about writing a book - now I´m thinking about it again!

Even if a novel doesn´t end well it´s well that it at least ends.

– Do you believe in mind reading?
– Definitely, how much do you want to borrow?

– Originally I come from a very fine family.
– Then you must have left home a very long time ago!

– Emil, you were talking in your sleep last night!
– Oh... then you have to excuse me for interrupting you!

It´s a pity that they tear down beautiful, old buildings and build new, plain ones – it really should be the other way around.

The funny bit is that in a hundred years these bad times have become the good old days.

– I distinctly remember the battle of Hastings.
– Impossible - it was in the year 1066.
– Yes, October 14th.

– I don´t live anywhere, ma´am. And he lives next door.

– Can you really make a living on begging?
– No, unfortunately, sometimes I have to contribute myself!

– Really, Thorvald, how can you face me?
– Yes, God, you get used to anything!

– I play by ear.
– Well, maybe your hearing isn´t so good.

– He fought all his youth for freedom.
– Where is he now?
– He was caught.

– Shall we go for a walk?
– Yes, and then we meet here again!

– Do you have omelette surprise?
– No, it´s just a slight cough...

– Why are you inside, my good man?
– Because I can´t get out!

– I had a dreadful experience this morning! I knocked on a door and asked for a cup of coffee...
– And you got it?

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Drawings and original texts: © The estate of Robert Storm PetersenStorm P logo